January 2012
166 posts
1 tag
“I think there is something beautiful in reveling in sadness. The proof is how...”
– Joseph Gordon-Levitt
how do u tell someone you like like them
build them a mating nest out of their discarded candy wrappers and napkins. proceed to ceremonially dance around their house, lighting small fires to signal you are ready to enter into holy matrimony. caw at them until they say they like you back! you are now gay married with children. congratulations.
1 tag
class actress is already the business on her own....
Met My New BF at Lunch Today
[Waiting for a crosswalk, a two and a half year old boy is standing next to me holding hands with his elder-ish Eastern European nanny. Across the street, a pug is being dragged into a building's lobby by a bored owner.]
Boy [to nanny]: Doggy! It's a doggy! Look!
[Nanny doesn't respond or look down. The boy modifies his emphasis, assuming that he's pronouncing it wrong because he's two and not fluent in English. He shakes her hand so she'll look.]
Boy: Dough-gy. Dah-gEE? Doggy! Over there!
[Nanny continues to ignore human organism displaying genuine interest and enthusiasm for his surroundings. The boy turns to me.]
Boy: It's a dog?
Me: Yep.
[He smiles.]
Boy: Yep. Dog.
Me: Mmhm.
Boy: Not iguana and not squirrel.
Me: Nope.
[The light changes and we walk away into the universe.]
1 tag
11 tags
Adam Sandler is a 35-year-old playboy manbaby who had it all with his cool single mom.
BUT THEN HIS MOM GOT REMARRIED
TO GRAMMY-AWARD-WINNING MUSICIAN SKRILLEX
And he’s gonna have to learn
That
HAVING A NEW DAD
ISN’T SO BAD.
The DubStep-father
This Christmas
Person 1: I hate you more than I hate Zubats.
Person 2: Woah man, I think you need to calm down and think about what you just said.
“A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be...”
– Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities (via bookmania)
